Sunday, March 18, 2012

Day 78 - Gently lean into it.

I am tired of the conversation I am having with myself.  I am tired of my whining, moaning and groaning that is going on inside my brain.

So, I know that it is time to make a change.

I've been here before.  Many times.  And, unfortunately, it feels kind of hopeless.  That, is never a good feeling.  And typically at this point, I do one of two things - either I give up (before I even start) and do nothing, or I try to tackle it head on and make a plan, filled with strict rules, crazy guidelines, and unrealistic expectations.  Neither works.  Both leave me feeling defeated and unsuccessful.

So, I know I need to first change my mindset, thoughts, and beliefs about this issue.  Because, these negative feelings I have right now is a guarantee of failure.

I am not sure I know how to change my mindset, thoughts and beliefs about this feels so ingrained into who I am.

But, I have done it before, for other issues.  And, once I wrap my brain (and heart) around a new way of living and thinking and being - it feels easier.

So I know I can do this!    ...Right?

Truth be told, right now, I am not sure.  I am feeling vulnerable and insecure and, well, scared.  But I think that instead of giving up, or tackling head on, I need to gently lean into it. 

Yep, maybe I need to lean into and feel my vulnerabilities, insecurities, and fears.

Wish me luck.


  1. I'll be with you every step of the way, celebrating your victories and picking you up after set backs. Together we can and WILL do it!! Good Luck and Good Friendship!!